Crass Consumerism out to get your momma.

There are times when I wonder why we, as a country (we being the United States of America in this instance), are so fat.  I mean we've got wide open plains and mountains and whatnot.  We can run and jump and climb trees.  I live in a not-huge suburban town and there are no fewer than four gym/health clubs within two miles of my house.  This should not be a thing that is a gigantic worry, but it is.

And during my recent attempts (successful thus far) at losing weight and becoming shapes I have come to a realization.  A realization that people throughout the rest of the world have probably come to before me but which reverberated down into the bottom of my soul.  It nested there and then spread throughout the various other layers of body and soul - ba and ka and kidneys.  The thing I realized is this:  America is, as they say, straight trippin', boo.  And that is a thing that they're still saying.

Now, you might think that with our correct reelection of the President (ooooh, Politics) that we as a people no longer "be tripping" but you would be wrong.  Wronger than literally every move that monkey made when I tried to teach him Parcheesi.

It's a simple goddamned concept.  Stupid monkey.

I ran into a situation not too long ago where the world was literally attempting to make me a fatter person.  Like somewhere, in a room there was a group of people dedicated to making everything about my life less healthful.  Not even that group that tries to tell me that smoking is cool or that it doesn't hurt to be "a little addicted" to meth.  Nope - it's a group of people in the food service industry.  And they can suck it.

Every day during my lunch hour, I take a walk down to a local franchise eatery.  Since I've been trying to lose the weights I transitioned to the point of having a "roasted chicken salad".  Then I walk back to work.  Total caloric balance for those playing along at home? Intake of about 150 kC, output of approx 340 kC as of my most recent measuring (this past Monday).

This fine day, the young lady who works the counter advised me that the cost of my salad had gone up.  Ok, whatever.   I can get that.  It wasn't a huge increase, and really why bother complaining?  I'm still getting out and exercising, at least a little bit.  Right? Right.  Well, then she tells me that I can save some money by buying the double meat version of the salad.

Wait...this place which advertises itself as the more healthy alternative to fast food would like to encourage me to eat pretty much twice the calories of what I intend to put in my body?  Why could this be?  Do these diabolical madmen want me to eat more calories just so my weight loss goals are harder to attain?  Then, I'll keep eating there since it's the only "healthy" alternative?

I get selling in volume or giving people a slight discount to make a "meal" instead of buying things a la carte.  I do, I accept that as a thing that happens.  But what can be the business decision here?  You are providing me less of a product.  Less of a product that is of the same kind and quality as your other offerings and yet you would like me to pay you more for the benefit of you keeping more of your product to sell to your other customers?  And if I wanted to eat that much meat on a sandwich it would cost me extra?

Has the entirety of the food world gone all topsy-turvy?  Become peopled solely by the most insane minds that could claw their way into positions of corporate governance?

Never mind.  I guess we all knew the answer to that.

I managed not to strangle the poor girl, but only just.  I know that some of you are probably thinking "why not just buy the cheaper salad and not eat all the meat?"  and while that's a valid thought process and sound argument (I suppose) it misses the point.  And the point is, I wanted to complain.  I wanted to complain in a place that I own and where there is literally no accountability whatsoever.  A place where I can complain in my underpants without my wife reminding me that company is coming over tonight.  (Yes, I am writing this at work.  My boss yelling at me is totally different than my wife harping on me about covering my hang down.)

And for that, as in so many other ways in my life...Mission Accomplished.